If you’re a ‘germaphobe’ like myself, dining out can pose a very real conundrum of possibilities for getting oneself into germy trouble. Restaurants, like people homes, can run the gauntlet from so clean you could safely like the floor to bastions of infectious cesspools. A place from which a budding pathologist could derive their post doctorate degree. Fortunately, with most establishments, things are on the cleaner side of the spectrum. This doesn’t mean you can let your guard down however. When someone said that ‘vigilance is the price of eternal freedom’ I’m sure they were talking about freedom from diarrhea or some such illness.
So what does the ‘vigilance germaphobe’ do when they eat outside of the sterile enclave of their homes? Thought you’d never ask! Following is my list of ten things I try and do when eating out:
1) Never, ever go to an eatery on the spur of the moment. Check the place out well in advance. Talk to friends. The grapevine is a great source to find out if the place is safe. Also look up their most recent visit by the Health Department.
2) Try and frequent only established eateries. Let any new establishments mature a bit (months) to see how well they fare. It’s much better if you hear about someone getting sick than being that person who got sick.
3) When arriving at a restaurant that is new to you, go immediately to the bathroom and check for overall condition including the presence of soap, clean towels and hot running water. While there, wash your hands thoroughly.
4) After being seated check out the person who will be serving you carefully. If they appear sick, then ask for a change of location or server. Men and women in this line of work are not paid very well and rarely are given time off for illness.
5) In a similar vein, scan the people sitting closest to you. If someone has red eyes and is coughing up a lung it might be wise to relocate or even evacuate.
6) Make sure you have a handy wipe to clean off the surface of the table yourself. Lacking this, watch the people cleaning table to see if they are using paper towels versus cloth or sponges. The later two can be loaded with germs from previous diners.
7) When the menu comes, have a paper towel in your hand to grasp it with. Menus are notorious vectors for germs. When you are done ordering, discard the paper towel.
8) If the place you’re eating at is say a Fish House, don’t order a hamburger. Stick with items that move off the menu quickly. The longer a food is in inventory the better the chance for problems to arise.
9) Keep the food you eat simple, stupid. Shy away from the fancy dishes with drizzled sauces and such. For instance stick with grilled items that are medium well done. Take a pass on the creamy pasta salad until you get home.
10) When you’ve finished eating make sure you pay with a credit card. This is one of the few times I use them. Credit cards are infinitely cleaner than exchanging currency at the checkout counter. If you must pay in cash, make sure you beeline it to the bathroom for a good washing.
There, that about covers it I think. None of these activities are all that difficult and shouldn’t keep you and yours from having a great time. Bon appetite!
The T-Como motel is located at 15881 US Highway 160 in Forsyth Missouri. Their phone is (417) 546-3431 in case you need to make a reservation.
